Self-confidence and self-trust are not the same problem
“Why do you want to quit your secure job and start a business?”
That sentence set me back by a lot when I was thinking of quitting my job in the Indian Army and starting Soulvyom. Because I am from a service family and people in the family don't do business. No one has done business in the family. And this and such questions didn't just make me rethink, but also doubt my own decision.
And then, later, someone would suggest a new course, promising great results in getting new clients or getting better, and off I would go running behind the new thing. It was not that I didn't have confidence. I was an officer of the Indian Army, of course. But the thought that the person selling me the new course had an established business and so, knew better than me!
Now you might ask me, is this the wrong post? Have I copy pasted something else under Larch vs Cerato? No, it is not. Stay with me and read on.
This is the Cerato state, when you have capability and confidence but still don't trust yourself and your abilities to pull it off. And this is one thing that makes pinpointing Cerato difficult. Because usually we ask “do you have a problem taking decisions?” and the Cerato does not find themselves indecisive at all. They take decisions fast enough. But their decisions become wobbly once another opinion appears.
Then you have another lot, and possibly you know them in your life. Maybe you are one yourself. How many people have you heard saying, “I really want to start my own work, but...” The reason might differ, it could be any or all of:
- I don't think I can do it.
- Opportunity is not coming.
- There are so many people already in this field.
- Who will take care of the family? How will we survive on one income?
Whatever be the reason, do you see the pattern here? Don't look at the reason though. The person knows what they want to do, they may also not be confused about the decision. The issue is that when they imagine themselves doing it, doubt creeps in.
Can I handle it? Am I good enough? What if I fail? Why would anyone choose me when there are people more capable?
Now this is Larch territory. They have decided but are underconfident.
How do you differentiate between the two?
Both might start with the same statement, “I am unable to make a decision,” or words to that effect. Sometimes the client may also come blaming that favourite word of many, ‘procrastination.’ Now, you hear these words and think Larch and Hornbeam, but that is jumping the gun.
First you have to ask them an incident or two where they couldn't make a decision or are procrastinating.
Then you listen to their words. “I was planning to buy a TV for my room and got caught up between a 24″ or 40″ TV. I think the small one is fine but my children suggest a 40″. Even my mother has a 24″ but I can't decide.” This is Cerato.
Or, “I am an artist and since five years have been wanting to start professional work but it is not happening. I have got my logo and website also booked but not pursuing further.”
This may look like procrastination, but let's go a bit deeper. Ask what happens when they think of actually putting the work out.
“There are already so many good artists. Who will pay me? I don't think my work is at that level yet.”
Now we are entering Larch territory.
About the Author
Lt Col Abhinav Sharma, SM (Retd.) is a Bach Flower Remedies practitioner and educator at Soulvyom Research LLP. He teaches Bach Flower Remedies through live comprehensive programme and also provides personalised BFR consultations. His teaching focuses not on learning the remedies but recognising and distinguishing similar emotional states and applying remedy knowledge to real conversations.
